Tuesday, July 15, 2008

"PART TWO" Ever had a replay

I have returned with yet another part of the memories enjoy....

When I was a child I was more or less a loner I guess. I really didn’t hang out with the girls too much crap going on with them.
The baby dolls, dresses and playhouse stuff. The sitting at make believe tea talking of who was going to be who’s husband… lol…
I just never got into the whole thing. I played with the boys they were simple and easy to deal with. They didn’t want all that mushy crap.

Skipping school with fishing line and a hook rolled around a stick. I would hide it outside where no one would know where to look.
Pick it up and stick it in my pocket and walk to the bus stop. We would all stand around the four of us talking about where we would go for the day to fish.
I was what 11 or 12 yrs old at the time. These boys had been my friends ever since 1st grade.

We would see the bus coming and one would say I forgot something and the rest would follow. We would sneak off to my grandfathers barn and stand on the back side of it until the bus passed then off threw the pasture to the woods on the far side.

Then over to where they made fertilizer and to the railroad tracks. I would always be the one to feel the track for the vibration.
Some times I would place my ear close to they track to listen to it for up coming trains. Then we would cross Taylor Creek to the other side and to where the trees grow thick and the ground was wet. Best earthworms around. Long and fat just how the fish like them.
We always brought a small brown bag to put them in until we got under the tracks where our old coffee can was to put them into.
Sometimes I would go all by my self specially when things weren’t so happy at home.
There would be times when I would just run away I would call it. And just cross the tracks and sit there with my fishing line in the water waiting for the fish to bite.
And when the train would cross I would cover my ears and watch one car after another pass and at times I would sit there and dream of catching one of those cars to a train and riding for as long as it would go.

Take me away from all the stuff that was going on where something happier would be.
It’s funny how children dream and they never see the danger or and thing.

Yesterday I went down to the place where I went as a child. With it being Sunday there was no one around. I crossed threw the line of trees which for some reason now didn’t seem as thick like when I done this as a kid.
A cross the fertilizer place. Man the smell was as strong as it was when I went threw there years and years ago. The hills weren’t mountains as they were when I use to pass by them back then.

The closer I got to the track a familiar feeling came over me. The excitement of the tracks and what they meant to me as a child. And how warm they felt from the suns rays or how cold they felt at night under a full moon.
And yes to answer the question that is in the back of your head. Yes there were times when we had to hide from my stepfather. Most of the times my mother would grab the younger two and out she would go.
Me being the oldest around 9 or 10 I would take off my own way to hide until we got together to go out to my cousins house out on Mitchell Rd.
Yeah my stepfather was a very mean man when he drank. I’m not sure if I am ready to share those stories with the world yet.
Many bad, bad times.

So back to Sunday. As I was walking I could hear things like from the pass in my mind.
I could hear my best friends the guys that use to play hooky with me and fish..
I could almost hear the laughter and them calling to me asking me if I brought my lunch bag with my sandwich and what ever I could stash into the bag for lunch.
All of us use to brings something different but it had to be good also. If you brought something like tuna fish well it was bad. You were called a moron or what ever else was thought of.
Maybe even had to take a punch in the arm from the rest of the group.

But it wasn’t that bad we were together laughing and talking about every thing and any thing. The simple life I see now even though it was a very hard time of my life. So I smiled at my childhood ghost and I kind of asked them if they would like to join me in my walk as I continued making my way to the tracks.
There was grass poking out of the ground around them. In some places where they would bring the cars up for unloading to the plant.

And as I walked to the main tracks the rocks crunched and moved under my shoes. White grayish rocks with flicks in them.
They sparkled in the sun light. We use to say they were diamonds or some other stone that was going to make us rich back then.
I kind of smiled as the warmth from the rocks floated up with the smell of diesel.
The wooden trusses brought back memories of trying to walk on them without touching the rocks.
Well it wasn’t really walking for me I kind of hopped and skipped sort of. Always in a hurry to get to the other side so I could look further down the track. I stood there and looked at the tracks and a tear came to my eyes. So many years these tracks have laid here.
I wondered if there were other kids that would cross them to go fishing. More likely not because kids these days don’t know what it’s like to have to get out and discover things it’s all right there for them in there bedrooms or the den or where ever you have your video game set up. That’s there adventure.
So I kind of felt sad for the tracks. Thinking how long it must have been since they heard laughter and talking. And felt the skipping feet.
I knelt down and placed my right hand on the rail. The warmth ran threw my fingers and into my hand as I touched it. It felt like reaching out shaking a old friends hand.
I looked left and right then I lowered my head to where my ear was right over my hand so I could hear for the vibrations in the track. No humming it was silent so it was alright to stand up and proceed. It was as if my feet were walking the same path.

Stepping on the wooden trusses stepping one at a time. Watching my foot come down on one then the other.
I could smell the creek dried up some not like I remembered it being. The old musky smell.
I didn’t recall any smell back then. Unless it was an animal that may had been hit by the train and threw off to the side of the track.
And if that happened boy my friends would throw a fit. They knew if there were any dead animals that weren’t already rotten we had to properly bury them. Hey it was the right thing to do. But if they were way far gone where you could see the bones or you know disgusting to even kids.
Well we would pinch our nose with our fingers and breath threw our mouths and make fun of each other as we hurry away from the smell.

As I walked on the tracks crossing the bridge. Well it’s not a very big bridge but it is one …lol…
At least it’s not so big now I remembered it as longer. Crossing it I could feel my heart pounding in my chest and a excitement running in my veins.
Getting to the other side I looked left and right to see if you could see any trains far down the tracks. Nothing but those big poles that hold the lights for the trains to see.
The ones that go from red to green. But mostly they stay red. Walking over the rocks down towards the ground by the bridge I just took it all in and remembered when we use to climb down this way.
We were always on the look out for big grasshoppers or other bugs we could use to fish. And the big look out
Snakes. Yes there were snakes.
You know thinking about it man we were nuts and had no fear of anything back then. Danger was exciting to us if we even thought about it. We could have slipped and fell broke a leg or anything

Once on the ground I looked around and started walking towards the field of trees. There use to be cows all threw these fields but now the lay empty at least were I could see.
Walking towards the trees I found a place where they shaded the ground and I sat there for a while and just relaxed a bit.
That walk was very long and I was kind of breathing a little heavy now. I knew I had to rest before I took the trip back and over the tracks.

I must have sat there for an hours or more then I heard it. The whistle coming from the east end of the tracks. I sat up and there it came.
The Amtrak train. Heading north it may or may not stop up at the depot down the track a mile or so. It moved fast passing where I was and it’s whistle was very loud.
I just watched it as it passed by. Once it had passed by I stood up and started back to the tracks so I could cross the bridge to the other side.

As I crossed I thought once again of the old days and how simple they were and wished that I could go back to them and just stand on the outside and watch them play like an old movie.
Walking down the tracks I felt as if I was losing something that was important to me. I stood there for a moment and said to my self it was a good day I wish I could place it in a bottle and take home with me so when a time came and I needed that feeling once again I could open it up and feel it again.
I still sometime feel the urge as a child to jump in a box car and just ride it down the tracks. But that was a child’s dream to runaway on a train and find a place where there was happiness and no pain. A place that as an adult I know doesn’t exist any where but in my dreams

Well I have finished a whole bottle of wine now and it seems the rain has either slowed down to very soft drops or has stopped altogether now.
The music is now bring back thoughts and memories that hold a secret in my heart so I have to close and deal with them yet another time.
I hope these fond memories made you smile and it brought back a memory or two of your childhood times or another special memory you hold dear.
Thanks for reading…..


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Well done! I loved it. The first one jumped around a little but you stayed on topic this time and it was great.

Can't wait for the next one.