Beautiful Big Ocean Waves

Life is like a ocean. You can stand there and feel it's soft gentle waves kiss your feet or you can run at it's power.

I love the ocean. I sit some times and watch the waves roll in. And think of all the stories I have heard over the years of grown up as a child.

Why is the sea so salty? The sea is so salty because of all the tears that every one has shed runs a river to the sea. It's funny how little things pop into your head when you are sitting there looking out over the wonderful ocean.

There has been times when I have sat on that rock and watched the waves rush up and splashed against it. I have sat there and felt the spray and let the ocean take my tears and my pain out to sea. I have shared my joy with the sea too.

I sit here today at the oceans door with many things on my mind. And yes I have a heavy heart. I have opened my self up once again and had faith in some one an believed in the simple things as trust, honesty, hope.

Through my life I have had so many things that have gave me life changing thoughts. I see things for what they are. I enjoy the simple things. A hug from a friend. A smile from a stranger. To watch a child play in the rain.

I try not to close my self off and I always try to believe in that through bad times we learn and we see tomorrow will be yet another day to believe in.

I have learned a great deal from people I come in contact with and I do not judge one person by another.

I have had walls that I have put up because of what one person has done to me. And it's not really the actions it's the pain that was gave either out of meaning to do it or by not. It's still your actions. I have learned that ones actions must be thought about before releasing them because once they are there they can't be taken back.

So over these past week with some things that have taken place I have been doing some deep soul searching with in my self. And being the type of person I am I hold things in and keep them to my self in order not to say or do anything to hurt any one. And this is just venting and we all need to vent.

I have had people come into m life and become wonderful friends and I have excepted them for that. And I have had some com into my life and become energy vampires that such every ounce of energy from me.

My release to the ocean to day is a simple one. My tears I shed are tears of loss. I give the waves my pain in my heart to take away. The loss of a true friend that you hold dear to your heart and you believe in them with your soul. On that accepts you for you and sees your inter self. One that holds your hand and listens below the words you say. That wipes your tears when you cry. That is a true friend and hurts when you hurt.

No this friend did not die to this psychical world we know. This is not that type of a loss. This loss is of someone that I have trusted over the years and believed in through out everything.

This loss is the most painful loss to my heart. But all in all it's a loss I knew would finally come but I did not want to accept because of all this friendship meant to me. I respected this person's point of view and option to it's fullest. But as things goes in life we must let some things go and move on. Not forgetting the things we have learned and shared.

So my dear friend some where in time when you are sitting around and if by any chance I cross your mind. Remember that I do love you and I hope you life dream does work out and you finally do find the happiness you search for. Always remember that I will always carry you in my heart. And I will always think of you with kind and loving thoughts.

And when the moon is full I will see you and think of you kindly. I hope that one day you realize that the one thing you were always in search of was right there all the time.

Be happy, smile and don't forget to laugh. And remember me with a kind and loving heart when you look upon that beautiful full moon that I shared with you.

Sorry for the babbling and I know all who reads this will not understand. But it's alright I am not expecting you to understand. All I am doing is venting my heart and my pain to the ocean.

Life goes on and lessons are never ending and I now know where the weak points of my walls were. Thank you for teaching me the things you have taught me. And thank you for reassuring me of the true fact that I really knew deep down inside. This lesson you taught me was learned. Thank you for all the happy times. Thank you for the laughter you gave me. Thank you for making me feel special when the true thing was I was really just like any one else. Just looking to find happiness.

When you see that big full moon make a wish maybe just maybe the man in the moon will hear you and grant you your wish. He has stop listening to me.

With that the waves takes yet one more heart felt pain away.

Good luck with your life......

I will always keep you with me some where hidden away in my heart........